Culture Shocked!
by EE Diamond
Summary: The Sequel to Culture Shock! A tag fic between myself and EE's Skysong where the Tortallens get transported to Bayville, New York and insanity insues! Now possibility of being a triology!


Disclaimer: Me an' Di? Own the X-men? How clueless can you be? Our hostile takeover has yet to be enacted.

(Di's A/N: As ya can tell I'm hosting this one!)

(An: And here it is! Culture Shocked, the sequel to the infamous Culture Shock. Is there continuity? ...Good question, but Di and I would like it if you went back and read 'n reviewed the first one. Our egos need stroking.)

If anyone had happened to be in Bayville Park at about eight AM that morning, they would've seen a bright flash of light, heard a plethora of screams, and a very, very loud thump as several bodies hit the ground.

"Ow..." said several voices all at once.

"I believe... that it is safe to assume that that did not work," Hank groaned, pulling himself out from beneath Logan. Who knew adamantium could be so heavy?

"No, no, we're back," Logan said. "No other place on Earth could stink so much."

"Well, if it, like, worked, then what're they doing here?" Kitty asked, pointing at the Tortallans mixed in among the X-men.

"Good question," Numair, Alanna, Hank, and Neal all said in unison.

"Where... where are we?" Kel asked, lying on her back and looking quite dazed.

"Welcome to Bayville, New York," Kurt said, "weirdest place on this little planet we call Earth."

"We messed up, didn't we?" Neal said, rubbing his head.

"Yes, probably," Numair agreed, looking around. "We shouldn't be here."

"That's obvious," all of the X-men chorused.

"What'd we do wrong?" Alanna wondered aloud.

"Maybe it was the Yamani?" Numair pondered.

"Speaking of Yamani... could someone do the favor of helping me up?" asked a rather irate Yuki.

Both Kel and an embarrassed Neal rushed to do so.

"Uh... maybe we should go to the mansion," Scott suggested. "The professor might be able to help... I hope..."

"Hold it a second," said Kitty, looking around. "Where'd Remy and Rogue go?"

Everyone else shrugged.

"Maybe they went without us...?" Scott said.

"Let's just go, please," Kel begged. "Tell me it's somewhere NORMAL."

"Uh..." said all of the X-men (sans Remy and Rogue, naturally), looking uneasy.

"No, we really can't say that," Kurt said, shaking his head. "Calling the X-mansion normal is like calling Rogue well-adjusted."

Speaking of, Remy and Rogue came out from behind a bush, looking a tad rumpled. Meaning, Remy's face had suspicious purple smears on it and Rogue's shirt was on backwards.

Neal tapped Kel on the shoulder. "Didn't you do that with Cleon once?"

"Bush or sword, bush or sword," Kel muttered cryptically. "Bush," she decided, and flipped Neal over her hip and into the bush Remy and Rogue had just emerged from. "If you'd spend more time down at the practice courts instead of the library you would've seen that coming."

"Did it have to be a hawthorn bush?" Neal asked dryly. "You KNOW I'm allergic."

"And YOU know that I never did any such thing with Cleon," Kel retorted.

Meanwhile, Remy and Rogue were getting the third degree. "Why is everyone starin' at us?" Remy inquired. "We weren't doin' anything."

"Oh, yeah right!" Kurt fumed, giving him a death glare.

Rogue brushed herself off. "Are we goin' to the mansion or what? Because Ah could be doin' much more important things with mah time."

"Like making out in a bush," Kitty said.

Rogue and Remy did nothing to deny that.

"She's got a point," Scott said. "Let's go... before they kill something," he added, uneasily eyeing the Tortallans.

"Kill something?" Alanna said. "Why would he think we would kill something?" The expression on her face was just a little too innocent to be easily believable.

"BECAUSE IT'S A MOVING METAL DEATH MACHINE?" Kel cried, as they exited the park and came out by the highway.

"...Those are cars," all of the X-men chorused.

Kel's death grip on her war hammer loosened a bit. "So... they aren't death machines powered by the spirits of small children?"

"I believe that's obvious," Kurt said. "I mean, they could kill you, but only if you're dumb enough to walk out in front of them. Now would you please put the big, sharp object away? We here in Bayville do not carry around big sharp objects... usually."

"You really need to work out your issues with death machines," Neal commented to Kel.

"Yeah. Maybe I'll try my therapy on you," she growled.

Neal quickly skipped over by Yuki and thus out of easy reach.

(I b'lieve that's good enough. REVIEW! Because me and Di would like that.)


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